Not making mountains out of milestones

Yesterday, was my birthday. I turned 35. It is not officially a milestone, but 35 is still a fairly significant number as I am now FIRMLY in my mid-thirties. I'm the kind of person who LOVES birthdays. I love getting presents. I love people thinking about me. I love being treated to breakfast/lunch/dinner/a night out (or all of those things). I love taking a day off work and spending it with my family. (I always do this!)

What I do NOT like - is the numbers creeping up.

I have always freaked out at milestone birthdays. I did not have the customary big party for my 18th birthday, nor for my 21st birthday, probably because I wasn't ready to celebrate becoming an 'Adult'. Turning 25 was even worse. Halfway to 50 was NOT appealing! Turning 30 was probably the worst. I did have a big party, but only because I thought I should, but it wasn't really me... and I wasn't really myself at that time. I didn't really know who I was, or what I wanted... it was all a bit uuuuggghhhh... I'm thhhiiiirrrttttyyy... W.T.F.....

Five years later, and things are completely different. Thirty-five feels surprisingly good!

In fairness, my priorities have changed a bit since turning thirty. I now have 3-year old twins to distract me. Not only do they not give me a minute to navel-gaze about how much older I'm getting or how many things I haven't achieved, but they inspire me to have a more positive approach to life in general and to look forward to being around for a long time to come.

A walk by the reservoir

Actually, I feel better than I have in years. I have changed my diet significantly this past couple of months and my neighbour (who I have only recently met - even though she has lived two doors down for the past three years!) and I have started training using the C25K app - which is completely brilliant. We're in week five now and I find that we are hitting our stride. I look forward to each session - I have never looked forward to exercise EVER - so it must be good!

I have finally, FINALLY cut out wheat completely from my diet and stopped the nasty pizza habit I picked up when I was pregnant and carb-crazy and somehow forgot to quit... for three years.... even though I'm wheat intolerant...

I have also cut out all other junk/processed food and have not succumbed once in over 6 weeks. It feels good.

Yesterday, I enjoyed my birthday - I didn't make a mountain out of the milestone. I enjoyed the day. The sun even came out!

I like 35. It suits me. I know (mostly) who I am and where I am and what makes me happy and that's the best feeling in the world.

I am lucky. Truly lucky.

Bringing in the May

I'm a little bit 15 days later than I intended with this post, but then, the Summer is a bit later in making an appearance this year too, so I don't feel so bad!

The first of May was Bealtaine - the first Day of Summer. The weekend was indeed a glorious one and it really did feel like Summer. In fact it felt like we had skipped Spring and jumped straight to Summer... but unfortunately it was a bit of a trick, because it didn't last and we're back into fitfully flipping between Winter and Spring weather with the occasional hour or two of Summer thrown into the mix.

On the Mayday Bank holiday, however, I'm delighted that we spontaneously grabbed the opportunity to enjoy the good weather  and headed off the beaten track and into the mountains, avoiding the throngs of people headed to our local seafront.

We found a sweet little picnic spot and lazed around in the sunshine for a few hours.

I had cobbled together a bit of a haphazard picnic moments before rushing out the door. An avocado, oat crackers, slices of goats cheese, some little sandwiches for the girls, some fresh pineapple and dried fruit and a bottle of water to share. It was just enough.

We stayed a few hours dabbling our fingers in the cold mountain stream and watching the clouds drift by and then took a leisurely drive back down the other side of the mountain and the long way home.

When we got home we assembled our Summer Nature table. The 'Spring Fairy' retired and the 'Summer Fairy' has come to stay for a while. The nature table has fast become our way of marking seasonal transitions and it's a nice simple way to make the girls aware of how the world around them changes throughout the year.

Later still, we had ice-cream on the front step in the evening sun. It was bliss.

And, even though, the weather has resumed its annoying inconsistency I am holding onto these sunny hours and looking forward to the long lazy Summer of freedom that my Parental Leave is affording. May has long been my favourite month. A month of dandelions and bluebells. A month of green leaves finally making an appearance... AND... it's also my birthday month. So, hooray for that.

Black Hole

There is a black hole in our house. Random things just go missing. Mostly toys, or the parts of toys that, when they go missing, render what's left, utterly useless. At least one book has fallen in too, just sitting on the sofa one minute, gone without a trace the next. No one has a clue where they are. Or at least, no one is admitting it. It's driving me crazy. I have searched every inch of the girls' bedroom and all of the 'nook and cranny' type spaces in the house. I've upended toy baskets and searched through clothes piles. I've peered behind radiators and pulled out bookshelves from against the wall. I've even shone a torch down into the dark hole in the floor of our linen cupboard to no avail. (There is, however, a plastic zebra and a piece of toy train track down there)

Where could they be?? They can't just disappear!!!

Our house is small and therefore there are a finite amount of places for things to go, we gutted and renovated this place and I know every inch of it like the back of my hand, yet somehow there is still a place I do not know about. A place somebody else does know about - likely someone small - but they're not talking. And the missing things haunt me.

I recently recognised another black hole in my life. A black hole that I have carried around with me since I was 12 years old. It had been with me so long that I had become almost blind to it.

Every now and then, when my bus is late and I'm being rained on I catch a glimpse of the black hole in my peripheral vision, a couple of weeks ago, for no particular reason, I did a fairly depressing sum on my bus journey home and the black hole finally came into sharp focus. I hadn't had a particularly bad day, my bus wasn't late and I hadn't been rained on, so I'm not exactly sure why I added it up, but I did. And I stared at the final tally in disbelief- it was a huge, frightening, black hole and it has swallowed up much more valuable things than toys and books.

I started commuting to secondary school by bus when I was 12. An hour each way at that time. I did it for 6 years. I then went on to commute to university, by train, an hour each way for 4 years. Then I spent a year faffing around before getting a job in 2001 in the city, where I have worked since and have spent roughly 2 hours a day, five days a week, for most of this time travelling to and from. Taking slight adjustments into consideration (two years living two hours away from the city and 7 months maternity leave), I reckon that roughly a year and a half of my life has been swallowed up by public transport.

A YEAR AND A HALF!!!!

That is a LOT of time. It is half the amount of time my children have been on the planet for goodness sake! My niece Elsie hasn't even been here that long yet, and it feels like she's always been here!

I know many, many, many, many, many, many people commute. I know that it's not entirely dead time. That a bus or a train is not a vacuum where nothing can happen. I know that there are ways to utilise this time, and I do to a certain extent. I have read books, drank countless travel-mugs of tea, conversed on the phone (and in school days in person) - albeit guardedly- with friends, written to do lists, caught up with current affairs and your lovely blog, people-watched, listened to music, nodded off to sleep, eaten snacks, planned parties and probably a million other things during these hours...

...I have also had countless bouts of travel sickness and picked up many a cough and cold. I have encountered lunatics and miscreants too numerous to mention, dodged many a sweaty armpit, regularly inhaled second hand weed-fumes and also... to reiterate... I have spent a YEAR AND A HALF of my one precious life on the bloody bus!

Stop the world I wanna get off!

So I am.

I am getting off the bus.

For a while at least.

I have applied successfully for 18 weeks Parental Leave from the day-job. It will start in June and see me all through the Summer and well into Autumn. It will give me time to be a stay-at-home mum - something I have not been since the girls were 7-months old. It will give me time to slow down and spend some time at their pace. In theory, it will give me time to get out into nature more, craft more, relax more, spend more time with friends and family. It will enable me to be there with my children as they transition from home to preschool.

It wont give me back the time I feel I have lost, but it will be a positive change.

Unfortunately it is unpaid leave, so we will be flat broke for the duration, but I feel like it will be so, so worth it.

I can't wait!


P.S. I read this article recently about where Young Adult's author Phil Earle writes...(on London's X68 Bus). He describes his 'bus time' thus:

"... bus time, that magical, beautiful, otherwise dead hour each way to the office is all mine. It belongs to the characters and the story I'm writing, and I unreservedly love it."

Now I feel like I should have something better to show for all that time I spend commuting where are my three cool novels for young adults? Where is that one children's book I keep thinking I will one day write? ... or even that partially written, probably awful, novel...

... maybe when I get back to work, I'll bear it in mind...

Felt Unicorn Tutorial

As promised, the Felt Unicorn Tutorial. But first, a little disclaimer... this is the first tutorial I have EVER put together.... I love to craft, but am by no means an expert and my stitching technique is probably highly questionable - so I hope it's alright, please feel free to make suggestions on how to improve it! The project is based on the Felt Horse design from the book Creative Play for Your Toddler by Christopher Clouder and Janni Nicol (a gorgeous book). The basic pattern is almost the same, but I have altered the body and head gusset slightly and added a horn. I had made the Horse for a friend's little boy and it was very well received. My girls have been getting really interested in Unicorns lately - and as I had planned a 'Rainbows and Unicorns themed birthday party I thought I would alter the pattern and make some Unicorns as gifts. Even though the party plans changed the girls still loved their Unicorns! These unicorns were customised to align with my girls' VERY specific favourite colours please feel free to choose your own colour combinations!.

You will need:

• An A4 sheet of white felt (for the body)
• Scraps of coloured felt for the horn and inner ears
• White embroidery floss
• Embroidery Needle
• Wool Roving or Polyester cushion filling for stuffing (I used Polyfill, because it was what I had on hand)
• Knitting Yarn in your chosen colour (my girls chose the yarn - probably because there was glitter woven through it!)
• Cotton Thread in a contrasting colour to the felt you are using for a horn.
• Sewing needle
• Pins

Begin by cutting out your pattern pieces. The Unicorn body should be roughly 16cm head to tail and 10cm head to hoof. You will need: Two body pieces. Two inside leg pieces. Four hoof pieces. Two outer ear pieces. Two contrasting inner ear pieces. One head gusset. One horn piece (we'll come to that later). You could cut the eye pieces too, but I didn't bother...

This is the pattern for the horse. I extended the top of the inside legs to make a thicker body and made the head gusset smaller to make space for the horn to be inserted. I hand cut the horn to size.

Two leg pieces are already sewn together in this picture!

Sew the two inside leg pieces together, along the top using backstitch. Now oversew the outside leg edges of the body sections to the inside leg piece.

 Oversew the hooves in place and stuff the legs firmly, using a knitting needle/pencil to pack down the stuffing.

Sew up the back of the Unicorn, leaving a gap at the back for stuffing, until you reach the top of the head, where the horn and the gusset will be inserted.

 Now, make and insert the horn!

To make the horn, cut a triangle with a rounded base. Fold over the triangle and stitch down the length to create a cone shape.

Turn the cone inside out and stuff with a small amount of Polyfill. A knitting needle is really helpful for this.

Next, take a sewing needle with contrasting cotton thread and thread through the middle of the cone and out through the point.

Wind the thread around the horn, making tiny stitches at the seam and pulling tightly to make indentations all the way to the bottom. Stitch in place at the base of the horn.

This one turned out nicer :)

Sew in the horn using a tight running stitch and then continue on, to oversew the gusset.

Then stitch up the neck and chest, making sure to stuff the body, head, neck and chest firmly before closing.

Stitch the inner ear to the outer ear, (or glue with PVA, if you prefer) and sew firmly onto the head on either side of the horn. You can add eyes now too, if you like.

To make the tail, wind a length of knitting yarn around four fingers 12-15 times (depending on how thick your yarn is). Sew this loop to the rear end of the horse. Wind a length of yarn around the sewn on area and tie off. Cut through the loop at the end of the tail and trim to neaten.

To make the mane, Repeat this process with smaller loops and trim to neaten - or leave all wild 80's Rockstar like I've done;)

And that's it - You have made a magical Unicorn! Now, go play!!

By the way, this is how the horse turned out, if you fancy making one of those instead!

I used cotton yarn for the mane and tail on this one and a contrasting embroidery floss. He was lovely and soft.

The Bunny Birthday Party

Yesterday, my little bunnies turned three. So, we celebrated with a Bunny Birthday party. (Originally we had decided on a 'Rainbows and Unicorns' theme and their birthday gifts reflect this... but more about that in a later post.) Actually, as it turned out, a Bunny party was a great theme to pull together at Easter time, so it came together much better than the other theme probably would have, and I didn't have to trawl the internet for bits and bobs, because every shelf in every shop was festooned with Easter paraphernalia that was more or less perfect for the party. The discount shops were especially full of the types of items I was looking for, so this party was pretty cost effective too!

I was a little bit fussy though, (of course I was) I wanted a Bunny party... but not an Easter Bunny party. The girls' birthday was two days AFTER Easter, and though I could have easily gotten away with Easter bunny stuff, I just didn't want the confusion. Also, the Easter Bunny had taken away their nighttime baby bottles (finally!!) and I knew that they would still be adjusting, so this had to be just bunnies of the 'cute and friendly' variety - not the mean old bottle stealing type ;)... I'm such a control freak!

Decor:

I was much more organised this year than I was last year and started preparing well in advance. I kept a pile of orange, green and brown card in the kitchen and every time I had a spare minute I'd cut out a carrot or a bunny shape and store them in a container so that the night before, all I had to do was string them into bunting and hang them up.

I loved how they looked and, because the girls had seen me cutting out all the parts, they recognised it immediately. "Mama, you made this!!" Lile cried, when she saw it - "I love it!!" That one statement, made all the painstaking cutting out worth it!

The bunting, coupled with lots of orange and green balloons were all we needed for decor - cheap and cheerful!

Food:
I have tried for the last two years to make a treat table happen, and it never really comes together for me. I just don't have enough of the fancy glass jars and cake-stands that make them look fabulous, nor do I have the cash or the inclination to purchase them, nor the space to store them between birthdays, nor the blank wall to push the table against - so this year I decided on a different approach! It should have been obvious to me as it's something I have been doing at work events for years- Treat Boxes - one for each child.

This party was a family only one - but we have a pretty big family, so there were still 12 children expected (11 of them under age 4!!!) and a treat box was the perfect way to ensure that every child got the same amount of treats. It  also left the table free for healthier foods that they could help themselves to and treats that were more appealing to adults.

I bought some cheap party boxes and glued a bunny cut-out to every one - that I intended to write 'Rabbit Food' on, but completely forgot about. I filled each box with...well, with the type of rabbit food you should definitely not feed to rabbits! There were chocolate lollipops and carrots, bunny jellies, marshmallow 'bunny tails', corn snack 'carrots' and a juice box in every one. We served them on a picnic blanket in the living room where they were very well received by the little cousins!

We kept the food as simple as is humanly possible. Devo made a million, perfectly cut, sandwiches and my sister made AMAZING carrot cup-cakes for the grown-ups. I made a super-easy chocolate biscuit cake from this recipe. Covered it with green butter cream icing and stuck the beautiful fondant flowers a friend made (thanks Faye!!) on to spruce it up. I found the bunnies for €1 each which the girls adored (they are now happily hanging out on our nature table!) and that was that!

This is the first birthday cake I have ever attempted (and in fairness, the flowers are the best part!) but I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out!

After cake there was jelly and ice-cream. I attempted to make ice-cream bunnies, but I don't own a scoop so they turned out a bit weird and un-bunny looking! I made them the night before (quite late) and kept them in the freezer in individual cupcake cases so that they were ready to plonk on top of the individual jelly portions at a moments notice!

Activities:

I had a few activities planned but we didn't do them all. I printed out some bunny colouring sheets and set out some markers. I also organised a little rabbit crafting session and the kids had great fun designing and decorating their bunnies. I didn't manage to get any photos of the session, but this little fellow got left behind so I snapped him. I love how he is eating all the carrots!! 

I had intended reading a bunny story aloud, having a bunny-hop dance and bringing them all out to the garden to plant carrot seeds in little pots (but it was freezing out!!), but all of the children seemed to be happy enough playing together so the craft activity sufficed.

Favours:

Devo made some super-cute bunny ears out of white card for all of the little guests at the eleventh hour the night before... and then we only remembered them towards the end of the party - but almost everybody got one in the end!

For the favour bags I found the most adorable little finger puppets, filled egg shaped bunny containers with jelly beans and added a mini Lindt bunny to a little gift bag.

The girls had a wonderful day, got ridiculously generous gifts and had the best time ever with all their cousins. We are so grateful to everybody who made it such a special day.

Happy 3rd Birthday to my beautiful girls!!